Monday, February 18, 2013

Surgery #2 for Rory

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We were up again around 6:30 for her 8:30 surgery.  Rory knew as soon as we were in the parking lot what was going on and what was happening.  We went to the back room and broke out the ipad, it calmed her and made her happy.  As for myself, nothing could make me feel any bit of calm.  
Sitting in that Room felt like an eternity.  This time it actually was an eternity- although the surgery was scheduled for 8:30 am, there were issues and we ended up waiting until she went back around 11:30.  Not only was it hard waiting and waiting knowing that they could take her at any minuet, but it was also hard because she was screaming for milk, juice, and applesauce.  I couldn't even get her water.
waiting...

I kept having to change the subject really quick and hope to divert her attention, but it didn't help.  She even got sick of the ipad after a while.  I kept singing songs and breaking out books and my phone, anything to keep her interest.  It is really hard to explain what was going on to her.  I was pretty pissed off by now, although I know it was out of my control and that things just "happen" but everyone that passed by our bed pretty much got a dirty look.  I just wanted someone to tell us when she would go back.  

waiting....

Finally around 11:30 they took her and Jon back (again, I was upset that I couldn't go back because I was pregnant).  That indescribable feeling of sickness, fear, and complete helplessness entered my body.  I went into the bathroom, cried, and waited for Jon to come back.  Then the waiting game began again.
still waiting....
I wasn't really sure what was going to happen to Rory today.  To my belief, Dr. Paley was going to clean out her wound, suture her up, and we would stay a day incase something happened, and then we would be home (at least that is what we packed for).   We knew the surgery would be significantly shorter than her 9 and a half hour super hip and super knee.  

While in the waiting room, I just sat and stared.  Luckily I had the ipad since I didn't pack anything to do this time around.  There was another family there who had a daughter who had a fixater on.   They had to come down like us, on a fluke thing that happened after their surgery.  We were talking about our situations and I said, “Things with us have been so crazy, I can’t wait for things to get back to normal.” She replied, “This is your new normal.”  

She is right, this is our new normal.  I thought about that until Dr. Paley finally came and got us.  It looks like she had finished her second surgery.

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